…a completely serious conversation in the hallway before class began.

Female student: “I can’t believe you did me like that!”
Male student: “What?”
Female Student: “You didn’t text me back!”
Male Student: ” I did too! You texted ‘hey’ then I texted ‘hey’ back!”
Female Student: “That doesn’t count! We are totally through.”

…as I walked out of my husband’s classroom.

Student: “Mr. B! Is that yo’ wife?”
My Husband: “Yes.”
Student: “She’s pretty!”
My Husband: “Why thank you, I built her from a kit.”

…as I was passing out quiz papers.

Student 1: “Aw shit, a reading quiz. Did you do your reading?”
Student 2: “Naw. You?”
Student 1: “Naw. Hey, can I cheat off of you?”

…while on lunch duty.

Male student1: “Did you hear we got a new student?”
Male student 2: “Really? Guy or girl?”
Male student 1: “Girl.”
Male student 2: “Is she hot?’
Male student 1: “Who cares man, she’s new.”
Male student 2: “You right.”